Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakura
SIX FAULTS THAT DESTROY BHAKTI
Jana-sanga
The sense enjoyers and persons fond of sense enjoyers are both worldly-minded. Persons who are fond of sense enjoyers are themselves also sense enjoyers, because they always think of sense enjoyment within their hearts. There are some people who are not themselves sense enjoyers, but they take pleasure in associating with sense enjoyers. Their association should also be renounced, because they will soon become sense enjoyers and bad association themselves.
There are two types of sense enjoyers-those who are extremely attached to sense enjoyment and devotees who are attached to sense enjoyment. Associating with those who are extremely attached should be totally rejected. The devotees who are attached to sense enjoyment are also of two types-those who have included the Lord as a part of their sense enjoyment and those who have kept the Lord in the center of their sense enjoyment.
Association with the latter type is preferable to association with the former. Although those who engage in sense enjoyment accordingto religious codes are better than the sinful sense enjoyers, still the practicing devotee should not associate with them until they become devotees.
Simply by wearing the dress of a renunciate one does not become a devotee free from sense gratification, because renunciates often collect and save objects of sense enjoyment. On the other hand, many persons resemble sense enjoyers but utilize everything in the worship of Lord Hari in the mood of detachment. Considering all this, the practicing devotee should give up the association of sense enjoyers and those fond of them and engage in devotional service in a secluded place or, if he is fortunate, in the association of genuine devotees.
Do not associate with women. On the other hand, when a woman is engaged in sadhana-bhakti, she should not associate with men. Associating with the opposite sex is very inauspicious for the advancing devotee. There are two types of men and women. When a man and woman are married according to religious principles, there is no sin in their touching and talking with each other; rather, this touching and talking is beneficial because of the scriptural sanction. There is, however, no provision for illusory activities other than the execution of reciprocal duties. If they are illusioned by each other and they engage in activities other than prescribed duties, then that is called stri-sanga and purusa-sanga, or association with the opposite sex.
For those who are engaged in worshiping Krsna, such association yields inauspicious results. If either one is guilty of such association, then they become an obstacle for the other party. If the wife is helpful in the discharge of devotional service, then the fault of stri-saga does not arise. But if the wife is an impediment in the discharge of devotional service, then one should carefully give up her association. We should consider the behavior of the great Vaisnava acarya, Srimad Ramanujacarya<$FSrimad Ramanujacarya sent his wife to her parent's home after she offended his guru's wife. He then took sannyasa.>, in this connection. When there is no marital relationship and one converses with a woman with evil intentions, then this is stri-sanga. That is sinful and detrimental to devotional service. Considering these points, the practicing devotee should very carefully give up the association of women and persons fond of women. As stated in Srimad Bhagavatam (3.31.35):
na tathasya bhaven moho bandhas canya-prasangatah
yosit-sangad yatha pumso yatha tat-sangi-sangatah
"The infatuation and bondage which accrue to a man from attachment to any other object is not as complete as that resulting from attachment to a woman or to the fellowship of men who are fond of women." For a householder devotee, touching and speaking to his wife in the above mentioned manner is not detrimental to devotional service; but for a renunciate there cannot be any type of talking or touching a woman, otherwise his practice of devotional service will be completely spoiled. Association with such a deviated person should be totally rejected.